“In the storm the lone wolf perishes but the pack will survive” – why community is essential
Don’t worry this blog does not contain spoilers from Game of Thrones season 7 finale but I couldn’t help but be compelled by the sentence in quotes I put in the title. ( fans go and watch it now!!)
Thought it might be interesting to explore some questions this week. They sound easy to answer but I gotta be honest I squirmed when being really honest with my answers.
This past week being the eclipse week has required me to ask myself some very important questions you might like to ponder too.
What do I stand for? What do I really believe? Who has the power? What am I willing to do? Who is my tribe and why? Where do I belong?
I wrote a stream of consciousness letter to one of my Facebook Groups this weekend ( You can read the whole enchilada and join in our High Vibe tribe if you are interested – it’s called Oracle School Insiders Group) about my beliefs, ethics, values, and where I’m coming from in all my teachings, books, blogs and oracle cards, my view on spirituality as an inherent right, why oracles can be a portal to manifest your most amazing life etc. so people aren’t confused about who they “follow”.
As much as I am clear that there will always be an evolution of ideas in my work, I feel it’s also necessary to provide a foundation, a jumping off point so people can determine if they are a fit or not. I like to know who I am learning from too, what they stand for, what they believe so I can feel like I belong or not.
I don’t however confuse the message with the messenger. I have learned so much from teachers that bug the crap out of me ( obviously my stuff.. I eventually come around) because I have kept my focus on the content and how I might be able to apply it. Principles before personalities is a valuable consideration. That said life is short and there are so many spiritual teachers, authors, writers to follow why waste time on one you don’t vibe with?
In my own exploration of all things spiritual, metaphysical and philosophical I have found immense value in the many paths that were set in motion to help us understand “ the meaning of life”, human potential and the infinite possibilities available if we keep an open mind and heart and have the courage to go beyond what’s considered mainstream and dogmatic. If you want to read the whole thing and explore our awesome tribe go here!
Back to the point of this blog, which is underlying the idea that if we see ourselves always as separate from one another competing for limited resources in a turbulent world we will always be looking for differences, for ways to denounce others and volley for power. We humans are so strange that we go against Nature to ensure our existential outlook is maintained. The lone wolf exists even when surrounded by others.
I will boil it all down to the concept of suffering and being committed to reducing it while on this planet. Being together in community, in a tribe enables a support that is essential to the whole, as well as the individual, doing no harm ( which has large connotations but for another blog) and meeting whatever challenges come up with compassion and kindness.
I know I will never get any of this perfectly because like everyone my 5 senses hypnotize me too to view the world as millions of separated parts bumping up against each other, sometimes hopelessly destructive and others in orderly synchronization. But deep down, even when I’m temporarily asleep I know another world exists in the hidden realms, a huge vast Consciousness that animates everything.
It just doesn’t always make sense and maybe that’s the point.
I think about the people in Texas and Louisiana right now going through horrific devastation from the flooding after Hurricane Harvey and I know I will do what I can, send money to animal rescue, and whatever else I can think of. In these moments I don’t have a clue who I am helping I just do it.
It’s when these horrible things happen that we get an opportunity to remember our connection and forget our differences. Would you only rescue people based on their beliefs?
I know your answer. It wouldn’t even occur to you.
We all need to matter but like the line in Game of Thrones says.. “In the storm the lone wolf perishes and the pack will survive.”
Every time disaster strikes it’s an opportunity for connection, collaboration and community.
If we would only learn.
So for this week, I wonder if we all might try an exercise of doing one kind thing a day randomly for a stranger. Just that alone is enough to remind us that we belong in a pack and not alone.
And, get into a community and participate. You will be reminded you’re not alone.
Love always
Very important message to re-mind ourselves. It made me think about all of the words that begin with the letter “C.” Consciousness, Collective, Community, Collaborate, Co-Create are a few,
They all speak to sharing, joining, belonging. On an energetic level each one of these words
are expansive, inclusive, and strengthen the whole. “None of us are as smart as all of us “.
“Each one teaches one.” One of my favorite quotes is from Chief Seattle; ” Man did not create
the web of life, we are merely one strand within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves.” Our energy, thoughts, attitudes, and presence touch others, they can uplift not only
others , but ourselves. When we take a moment to notice or direct our attention outward; it does have an impact hopefully leaving a positive vibration.
The other day while waiting at a stoplight to cross the street there was an older man who was impatiently starting to cross before the light changed. When he reached the other side; I said to him; ” You should value your life and take care to cross with the light.” His response was that he saw the car swinging into a turn. From my perspective, it looked pretty close to him. Of course he could have been defensive and tell me to MYOB; but I have been knocked onto my back by a Jeep, once upon a time; and know that one brief moment can alter your life. I saw the driver, he stopped and I was at a green light in my favor thinking it was safe to cross. Well, that moment was life-transforming and the injury that resulted led to a long uphill climb to restore a broken arm, and deeply impacted my confidence for quite some time. I was being considerate and concerned for his safety. No gold medals, or hero awards; just kindness. I might pat the head of an anxious dog tied to a post while the owner has left them . As I love dogs , I enjoy connecting with them . It helps the dog return to a place of comfort and calm. Only takes one moment. These are the gifts we can all share everyday. It re-minds us and those we share with that WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER> YOU ARE NOT ALONE> WE ARE ALL ONE>
XOXOX
I grew up an only child, and throughout my life I have gravitated towards group energy. I watched my Grandma Elsie’s beautiful friendships with other women, and her part in her community. I have often “adopted” sisters into my life and have some very important circles of support around me. I learned this, also in recovery,and in my subsequent work — the energy of a group has great power to shift the individual in a very positive and uplifting way.
I and so grateful and in love to be part of a community of people who have the intention to change the world one kind act at a time. Thank you for creating this, Colette, and All…this presence which we have collectively gives me great hope. I’m definitely “in” for doing a kind act daily…or two or three…quietly. Many blessings and love to you and to All this light-focused Tribe.
wonderful .. thanx for sharing!
Thank you Colette for your thoughtful, centered awareness. I watched the season finale (the only season I have watched), and that expression struck me, literally, reminding me to continue to co-create my own local tribe. There are so many blessings in being mindful of how we “show up” in life. Reaching out to humanity and the greater-than-humans in love has the potentiality to spread globally as others continue to share the love they received. The love we receive in return is the abundance of energy, which always returns to its origins. I’m excited to “show up” in love in my TSL course this semester, working with foster teens–a new tribe. ????
Sometimes we learn what NOT to be from some leaders and some leaders have a bad rep because of what society focuses on. I never wanted to learn from Freud until I learned his “other side” as an ecologically mindful psychologist. I’m reminded to allow people to stand on their own merit, in their own truth, and not form my opinion on what others highlight.
Grazie mille, Bella!! Blessings to you and yours in Light, Love, and Laughter in the Living!
Lady Fae
insightful response .. all sides are worth exploring … then we can choose
Colette, I left Facebook at the end of 2016 (inspired by some teachings Robert Ohotto did last year) and haven’t regretted it for a moment. Is there a way for those of us.who are Recovered Facebook’s to read your post because we can’t unless we “log in”?
Thanks!
I don’t know .. the article on Facebook was created as a file in the group so unfortunately you have to be a member to read it sorry! My entire school is run in Facebook Groups too ;(
Hi Janice
I too left FB – it was in November of 2016 for almost 2 years. Then in November 2016 I wanted to create a FB profile for our business (as like all technology when we are the masters and not the servants , it enriches our lives!!!) but the only way i could do that was to create a personal profile too. Initially I was reluctant as I didn’t want to fall back into the FB-black hole however I found the after the break I was able to recommit on my terms and I let people in my life know that I was only using it as a business tool and I would’ the following them on FB as I wanted to know what was happening when we met in real life or picked up the phone to chat. This has worked really well for me with this paradigm shift I am able to have a FB profile but not be an FB-addict. I share this post as I had recently been thinking about joining the CBR FB Oracle School and my inner dialogue went something like: “But you came off FB” “Do you really want to go back there” “That time waster” then the other side was like “It’s a tool to connect with content you are curious about on your terms” I have had my private FB profile running for 10 months now and not used it all – however I am thinking that perhaps I join the oracle school FB group. It is a bit like the ego driving the car – the ego makes a bad driver but as a passenger can offer some pretty good ‘advice’; it’s all about who is in control for me.
very smart . you have to be discerning on social media .. i use it on my own terms too .. stay positive and only allow meaningful conversation
Recovered Facebookers. Lol*
LOL
I’m in a place where, I feel like the wolf. I work in a hostile environment, counting the days to vesting..only couple months more. I sometimes wonder if even those few days are worth the hostilities endured daily. It makes me depressed, and I keep praying for a new career…looking and planning. I have lived in Texas, and I feel for all those displaced, animals and people..i felt selfish, for thinking I have it bad. I always think that when I’m troubled, and feel selfish, for thinking of myself. How do you choose, help others first, or help yourself first, to get to where you can help more. I try to be positive, but by the time my workday is at end, I’m like I’ve got to get away from these negative people, they are killing my spirit..they are so mean..i actually think some are evil..and what’s bad is I work in a prison, and it’s not the prisoners, I’m talking about..its the staff… I have maybe 3 to 4 others that feel the way I do..so, it’s like a small pack, against the death army!! I always do what I can to help others, in small ways, whether it’s buy diapers for someone or let them go ahead of me, that’s just the way I was raised, to treat others as you want to be treated. The golden rule. I think based on your ethics, principles, sometimes you have to stand for yourself and not be pulled into a group where you don’t belong.
I agree Shirley:
It is very good that you are aware of the “courage to change the things you can”.
LOV : )
Shirley, I SO MUCH understand what you mean. I’ve been to many different prisons (as a visitor) – SUPERMAX, MAX, MEDIUM – and there was only one time that I ever remember feeling uncomfortable around a male inmate. The inmates I have met over the years I have found to be really amazing souls even in spite of their crimes. Being empathic, I often discerned their pain and understood what led them there. (Now, I am a several time crime survivor…a few of those crimes commited against me were unbelievable, but somehow, probably Spirit, helped me to see past the hate I initially had.). When it came to the staff, I was almost always completely uncomfortable and on my guard, except for one amazing CO who never lost their sense of compassion in a very difficult job. The inmates had a great respect for her too. She was no nonsense, but treated them like the fellow human beings they are. (When I think of her, I recall, “There but for the grace of God go I!). Sadly, I had several “unpleasant” interactions with most of the other staff at the different facilities… and I was just a visitor. Several of my other friends were volunteers at different prisons and felt the same way and had similar experiences. It sadens my heart. We’re such a traumatized humanity. And in that trauma, if it’s not worked through, leads to much more trauma. Blame, finger-pointing, hatred, prejudice. We all have it in us. If we would just accept it, work through it, come to some understanding of it, maybe even eventually let it go… maybe we wouldn’t have prisons and hate crimes and war. I don’t know. I really don’t. (Deep sigh!!!). Sorry. I went off on an idealistic tangent. Peace!
Your questions made me think two different ways. This may be long. I love the way you make me think and the only time I talk in on line and couple sites. Lol. I have been looking for ways to make extra money, from HOME. Ya, from home. So who am I? Someone who has put her dreams a little more realistic. Gave myself a little more time. Remembered the world is so messed up. I don not know how my kids do it in this world? and wow they do. I’ve gone and am going through some major changes right now. I’m becoming more Spiritual. I’m finally starting to look inside. I hurt a lot of people, I also hurt a lot. And I need to remember that Instead of Oct1/18, ,, I’ll leave Aoril 1st/ 19. in numorolgy. that is 11. I really like that number so for me, That is a good day to leave . Lol Better to leave in the Spring anyway. I’m so excited to do this. I’ going to drive our Beautiful Country of Canada. I’m taking my pets, cards , crystals,my teachings and my lessons and I’m going to find our Country, The ones who still love Canada for Canada. Not the ones who are wrecking it. We need to remember who we are. We are peaceful people, we don’t go to war, when we did we won, ask the States. Back to my lessons this past Month!. The Austrians, and the Americans are all over the internet. one week its one thing. Next week its another. I watched this guy. How he was going to launch this great big marking thing. How if you got in you could make so much money. All I could picture as he is talking is him pacing in the hotel room, drink in hand , maybe a smoke, and if not, running his hands through his hair till he walk to the stage. Pulls his pants up, takes a deep breath and hopes like hell he does not mess this up. And I still bought some sites after that.I even bought get paid to take surveys. The US one looked okay. Got on AFTER I paid for it. switched to Canada and there it is!!! All the sites I’m already a part of! Really? And I paid for the upgrade! We Canadians , do not even make the good list for the upgrades? what? really? okay now Im honestly done. Oh I hope I am. That was last night. So ya I’m a lone wolf. A Lost Lone Wolf. Looking for who I really am.Hoping my dark side, stays where it is and I learn to live with it not against it. I want a; 4 parts no matter which ones to balance to be in harmony. Just for a bit. catch my breath, have a coffee, yep a smoke too, take a picture too. just enjoy life for a bit. i hope we all get that!
I understand this message so well— alone life becomes almost impossible but with a group of friends everything seems possible. We get our energy and motivation from a group and anything seems possible.
Again wonderful reading, great eye opener and reminder that we are not here to work alone…we have so much to give and so much to receive from our friends– thank you for the wonderful insight– you’re the best.
thanx for writing!
Thanks for your beautiful post, Colette! Lots of love, xoxo
Blessed I am .. Dear Colette .. how thrilled I am that Spirit guided and concocted a plan that even a vision board could not vision !! .. I had prayed daily for a inspiring teacher, for something i could sink into, something that gave me the uumph to go forward with optimism despite any and all outer conditions. You offer me insightful ideas to ponder, you say things or write things i have often said to myself and others, you make me know through your example, that all things are possible > only believe. As a result of being led to you, my life is richer in many many many ways, and i feel worthy of the life Spirit breathes into me each day ! .. My family is richer too and my friends lives too .. even the gals/guys at the grocery store have reaped the benefits of my listening and implementing ideas i have learned or re-learned with you as my teacher .. so YES i feel hugely blessed .. I have been doing random acts of kindness daily anyways >> but now i will up the ante !! .. more random acts for me .. we can heal the world > one random act of kindness at a time !! .. you know i love you .. respect you and i am in gratitude to Spirit for your presence in my life .. so glad to be in the tribe !! xox ..
xooxoxooxoxoox
I love that your work evolves as your energy shifts and knowledge expands. I find it so helpful to have teachers who expand this way. It’s not teaching the same old, same old because we’re never that which we once were. It’s interesting how tribes expand and contract with the natural rhythms of the participants. Your online tribes are so insightful, giving and supportive. I find myself ebbing and flowing with my own participation in them but I always find something at the perfect time. Exercise challenge accepted <3
love it!! You get it!!
As ever, Colette, you bring pure love to everything you do. Thank you for being an inspiration once again. Thanks, too, from the great State of Texas for your loving thoughts and intentions.
Tribal Dancers! I have been absent quite a bit since mid January. The reason is because of the “Message and not the Teacher”. It concerns my X husband—-(yes, the eat all the cookies on the plate and take yours too, guy). We have been separated since 2005 with a divorce that settled in 2007. After that time I had no contact–trying to find myself. Trying to forgive him for the years of hurt and the final insult. Because of Colette I found the extra urge, the extra push, the extra support. This teacher lives by the “forgiveness is necessary for all” code that allows you to move on. But it is up to you as the student to interpret and exercise the lesson. Finally, the new day dawned when I knew I finally had forgiven him all the human errors, or as I jokingly call them “stupid man tricks”.
Then, he developed stage 4 cancer. He, as the lone wolf needed a pack to survive. He needed next of kin–he needed emergency contact–he needed our son—-and he needed extra ears and eyes. From moment 1–he asked me to go with him. Here lies the further lesson.
Forgiveness is the gift that you give the other person and yourself. But FORGETTING–which is the much harder—is a different experience. IT IS THE GIFT YOU GIVE YOURSELF! It is placed on your path to be the Higher Self that we are are all on this earth to become. To do out of need even when danger may be near. To witness what may be humbling time, a learning time, an accepting time for another. To truly “walk your talk” and remain connected to the divine and separate from entanglement. To be selfless without reward from any other source but your own soul. This is my interpretation.
He is still in treatment—-surgeries will be happening very soon, with recovery and, hopefully no more setbacks. He is responding, but it is each day at a time.
Namaste, Tribal Dancers! ????????Colette
wow this is so powerful xoxox
Well, I feel very much like a lone wolf myself these days, I’ve been through some very rough experiences for over the past 4 or 5 years honestly, and quite a lot of times when I’ve really needed some help or even just a friend to try to talk to about some stuff I was going through, there was really nobody there, no one who even wanted to take the time to listen to me. But, I am VERY grateful for the people who HAVE actually cared to try to help me, it seems like so many people live in their own world sometimes, a lot of people just text each other all day instead of actually talking to anybody, I can understand how busy people get sometimes but come on, BOTHER to give your mother or a good friend an actual phone call!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you know they’re not busy, it’s actually really nice to hear another person’s voice on the phone! And I will mention one person right now who has helped me A LOT, I’m even going to tell you his name, not because I’m trying to put him on the spot but because I am so grateful to have him on my side. I recently, for the past 2 weeks have had to deal with a very vicious woman for a landlord. My lease is written for a year, with it ending on October 31st, and I am making plans to move out of here then, because I’ve only lived here for 2 years and I have seen enough already!!! My lovely landlord decided to try to pull some illegal moves on me to make me leave at the end of September. I’m a good tenant here, I’ve always paid my rent on time, except for back in April on the day the rent was due, I had a couple of appointments during the day and I was feeling sick later, so I paid my rent one day late, the next day in full, and long story short these managers here tried to make me pay over $95 in late fees for my rent being one day late and this was the very 1st time I EVER paid my rent late, so I think that’s pretty extreme!!! But I have a really great friend, his name is Mike Daley and he is the head of customer service at our county’s Community Mental Health Center that is the head of all the agencies in different cities in this county. I explained what was happening to me and I don’t know how he did it, but he sent this woman some emails and got her to waive all her late fees!!!!! So recently, probably because she’s upset she wasn’t able to get some blood out of a stone, she was NOW trying to make me leave in September when my lease states I have till October 31st to move out, and believe me, I do want to get the hell out of here, but I am not certain as of yet as to exactly WHERE I’m moving to, I need to get some plans and money in order, so I was totally freaking out about this!!!!! I called several other people and community organizations leaving frantic messages and no one was even returning my phone calls. So once again, I don’t like to depend on him, but Mike saved the day for me AGAIN, and this evil person backed down and conceded that I can stay till Oct.31 as the lease states. Having to deal with all of this has really been difficult for me, but I am SO thankful for Mike, he’s a true hero to me. So in short, if you know someone who’s really going through a difficult time, even if it’s not someone you know very well, try to do something nice that will really mean a lot to them, because it REALLY will, and they’re not going to forget you!!!! I am so indebted to this person for standing up for me and my rights when everyone else just walked away. And this vicious property manager I’m dealing with, I’ve never even met her in person, her name is Luisa Jaramillo, if your looking for an apartment to rent and you spot her name as the owner or manager, I would advise you NOT to move there! I’ve never had to deal with a person like this before, and I hope I NEVER HAVE TO AGAIN.
This is so insightful thank you, my heart.breaks for the flood victims!
It is easy to get side tracked in life.
I enjoy your blogs they re-ground me somehow!
I’m still leaning the right questions to ask, yet what I do know is help your neighbour, stranger or not!
Also your meditation from the other day was amazing, I could only hop apon a dragon though (just watched the final of game of thrones) powerful entrance by Danarius.
Then you said if it’s a dragon that’s ok it’s as if you were reading my thoughts!
Thank you again Xxx
thank you for writing
Colette, your post has me very reflective. Thanks for sharing it.
On the one hand, I can understand it logically. From my experiece being in different packs (tribes), either I have a bad sense of judgement regarding what tribes to be in, or maybe the flippin’ Universe is trying to teach me some lessons, or goodness knows what else, BUT I actually decided a couple of months ago that I didn’t want to “belong” to any tribe. I wanted to carve my own path and not limit myself to being in “said group”. I’m still a partipant in the human race and do what I can to be helpful when needed to be or moved to be, but I much prefer going off into my “lone wolf” state. If I end up not surviving, I know it was my choice and the reasons why. At this point in my life, I have to honor that choice. Now, that might change, but it might not. I’m just grateful to have the choice. AND… I am truly grateful for not having to fit into the demands and enculturation of any particular tribe/pack! Whew!!!
good thought.. and I get it.. I think it was more about a call to compassion when others are in need.. why it shouldn’t be every man for themselves.. but your post made me think too!!
Hey Colette, I didn’t know if you’d actually put up what I wrote there, I know I am infamous for going off the deep end, but thank you so much, for ALL that you do!!!!! And here is some food for thought: Sometimes, in certain situations, the lone wolf is the ONLY one who survives!
I thought I had a great tribe and support and community till I got sick…and I’ve been on bed rest for the past 6 months and am having trouble getting any friends (or family for that matter) to help me with tasks and errands (such as grocery shopping) I need done…seems I was giving and they were taking but now that I’m in need and can’t give like I did, I’m being dumped.
sorry to hear that.. hope you get better soon.. and make new friends too xoxox
Thank you…and thank you for your weekly wisdom and encouragement for us all xoxo